


Running in Silence

by evakayaki



Series: David and Matteo University Series [8]
Category: Druck | SKAM (Germany)
Genre: Fluff and Angst, Insecure Matteo, Jealous Matteo, M/M, Original Character(s), Post-Canon, Sexy Times, The boys get into a fight, They're just figuring it out, allusion to sex, comforting david, relationships are hard
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-19
Updated: 2019-07-19
Packaged: 2020-07-08 07:16:11
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,644
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19865629
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/evakayaki/pseuds/evakayaki
Summary: “You are the first person who heard me. Who understood. Who fought for me to be more than a fucking vampire, even when I wasn’t fighting for myself. You didn’t let me run away. You stood next to me,” David sniffled, “How could you ever think that you’re not good enough for me?”-----David and Matteo have their first big fight that brings them closer together.





	Running in Silence

**Author's Note:**

> You don't need to read the series to read this. All you need to know is they live together, David is in university, and Matteo works at an LGBTQ+ center.

Matteo sighed as he pushed his key into the lock. After working overtime, Matteo was exhausted. He didn’t know why he even agreed to help Ingo with some administrative paperwork, but he did and instead of taking 30 minutes like his boss had promised, it had taken two and a half hours.

“David, you home?” Matteo called out and hung up his jacket, setting his backpack on the floor. All he wanted was to make pasta for dinner, eat, cuddle up to David in bed and watch a movie while falling asleep to his boyfriend’s voice making snarky and criticizing remarks about said movie. “David?”

It took a second before he received an answer of _in here baby_ from the living room.

That nickname along with _babe_ had never failed to make his lips twitch into a smile and his stomach flip. The names had come almost naturally. One morning when they were getting ready to go out for the day, David had absent mindedly asked, _baby, have you seen my black shirt_. From that moment on, the names stuck.

Voices other than David’s flooded through the air. Cat, Art and Fynn. He had briefly met them when he went with David to the university’s LGBTQ+ mixer.

They had quickly become a large part of David’s life. His best friends. David had met them through the university’s trans student group. Matteo knew they were both second year student’s and that David had never felt more _him_ or understood then when he had joined that group, made friends.

At first Matteo had been thrilled for David. He had wanted nothing more than for David to find acceptance and friendship at school. But Matteo had begun to feel alienated from his boyfriend’s life the more David experienced the world.

As soon as David saw Matteo, he smiled, and Matteo couldn’t help but smile back.

“Hey,” David greeted, “Babe, you remember Flynn, Cat, and Art. Guys, you remember my boyfriend, Matteo.”

Matteo muttered out a “na” and awkwardly offered drinks. When everyone declined, he sat rigidly next to David. Usually being close to the other boy made him relax, but not then. His hand ached to twine with David’s, and he wanted nothing more than to bury his face into the soft material of David’s shirt. But he sat there feeling out of place while David and his friends talked about the classes they were taking and the state of the LGBTQ+ community.

The one-time Matteo did try to contribute to the conversation, David’s friends chuckled and called him “adorable.” He had never felt more chastised in his life. All he had said was he didn’t really see the big deal in marriage. He had witnessed first-hand how bad a marriage could get. How much two people could tear each other down. He never wanted that.

When the group moved onto issues facing the trans community, Matteo found himself drifting. It was all so overwhelming. Of course, he cared about this community, but sometimes he just wanted to be with David without labels or communities or pronouns or anything else. Just _David and Matteo_. Like they were in that pool. Underwater with no pretenses.

And he knows he’s already worked this shit out. He and David had a non-fight fight about this shit. It’s been months since this has bothered him. And he’s over it. He’s accepted himself. He’s accepted being gay and everything _that_ means for him. Because _yes_ , he was a gay man. _Yes_ , he had come out. But why couldn’t he also just be _Matteo Florenzi_? Why did who he loves have to define who he is in society? Why couldn’t they just be David Schreibner and Matteo Florenzi, two boys who loved each other?

He was out and proud. He didn’t leave it a secret. He knew at this point it would be impossible for him to do so. There was just something about David that made Matteo want to touch him, look at him, talk to him, be near him. And he’d caught himself on more than one occasion crawling into David’s lap without even realizing he was doing it. He _was_ happy. For the first time in a long time — maybe ever — now that he thought about it. For the first time in Matteo Florenzi’s life he was truly 100% happy and at peace with himself.

But he wondered if David was 100% truly happy with him. Matteo knew he could be lazy, stubborn, and sometimes get into funks where he found it a struggle to control his emotions because he just _felt so much_ and didn’t know how to deal with it. Did David see the boy underneath all of the crap who loved him, who yearned to protect and care for him, who yearned to be taken care of and protected by David? The boy who wanted to do better, be better for _him_.

Matteo had sighed in relief when David’s friends finally shuffled out a few hours later. He turned around and walked into the bedroom, hearing the group make plans to meet after class the following day.

He tore his shirt off in frustration, dropping his pants and crawling into bed in his boxers. He huffed when his head hit the pillow and he tugged the blanket over himself.

His eyes followed David as his boyfriend got ready for bed. He watched David slip off his shirt and binder, back towards Matteo. David quickly pulled a shirt, one of Matteo’s over his head before slipping his jeans off and turning to face Matteo.

“Hey,” David said awkwardly approaching the bed.

Matteo nodded, “Hey.”

“Something up?” David asked sliding into his side of the bed.

Matteo frowned, “What?”

“You’re acting kind of off,” David shrugged.

“Nope,” Matteo popped his “p.” He needed time to process his thoughts and figure out why he felt the way he did.

“You kind of ignored my friends,” David shrugged, plugging his phone into its charger.

“I didn’t,” Matteo protested.

Running a hand through his hair, David sighed, “You basically tuned out everyone and played with your phone.”

Matteo didn’t know what to say. “They ignored me,” Matteo said weakly.

“What’re you talking about?” David frowned. “They kept trying to include you in the conversation.”

“They kept trying to make _fun_ of _me_ ,” Matteo said in frustration.

“No, they didn’t,” David stated. “Art just told me he didn’t think you liked them much.”

Matteo rolled his eyes, “Of course _he_ would say that.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“It means that someone like _him_ would say that,” Matteo’s anger had risen to another level at the thought of Art taking David away. He was someone who was probably 100 times better for David then Matteo could ever be. The guy actually had his shit together and knew about stuff important to David.

“ _Someone like him_?” David sat up straighter, giving his boyfriend a look.

Matteo sputtered, “Yeah, someone like him!”

“I...” Matteo watched as David stopped himself from speaking and opened and closed his mouth a couple times. In Matteo’s frustrated haze he kind of thought his boyfriend looked like a fish.

“Is it because he's trans?”

Matteo stopped dead in his tracks. Wait... _what?_ “What?”

“You heard me,” David threw the blanket off himself and stood up abruptly. “Do you have...an issue with other trans people?”

“What?!” Matteo repeated. He didn’t mean to shout but _What. The. Fuck?_ “Of course I don't. Fuck! I can’t believe you even asked me that?”

David shook his head, “Then why the fuck are you treating them like shit? You completely checked out!”

“Why the fuck does it always have to be about gay or trans or the community or whatever the fuck?” Matteo stood up now too, he was frustrated...no, not frustrated. He was mad. “Why can’t it ever be about _just_ people?”

“Because we live in that world, Matteo! You _are_ gay, I _am_ trans, we are part of a community!” David yelled back and Matteo had to turn his back for a moment because he could feel himself starting to boil over.

Matteo took a deep breath before turning back to face his boyfriend. “Why do you feel the need to have to label us all. the. fucking. time.” He seethed.

“Why do you feel the need to run away every time I do?” David shot back.

“I think you’re mistaken me for you. Cause that’s what you do, right? When things get tough, you run away?” Matteo dared David to say something.

“You know, I’m...I think I’m going to go to Laura’s before I say something I can’t take back.”

Matteo felt his hands ball at his side. “Sure! Run away! Just like you fucking always do!”

“Fuck you, Matteo,” David spit out, grabbing his discarded clothes.

The next thing Matteo heard was their bedroom door slamming. He sat heavily on the bed, scrubbing his face as angry tears threatened to fall. _What just happened?_ He sighed. This was the first time they had ever fought. Sure, sometimes they got into little squabbles over dirty dishes, or clothes on the floor, or even Matteo’s friends sometimes thinking that their place was a 24/7 party zone. But they never got into it like that. It freaked Matteo out.

Almost as soon as David had walked out, the boy felt all the anger drain from him. He replayed the events in his head trying to pinpoint the exact moment when everything went wrong, but he couldn’t. A part of him had wished he had just stayed at work later or came home earlier. Even when he was with Sara, they fought, _well_ to be fair, she got mad at him and he ended up just apologizing, but not like this. This was at his parent’s level. And _fuck_ if he didn’t sound like his father. He didn’t want to be his father.

But he wasn’t going to go after David. He wasn’t. This wasn’t his fault. It wasn’t his fault. But fuck he wanted to. He knew he was going to end up on Laura’s doorstep. But he was going to let David stew and be lonely for a little while because _fuck_ , Matteo was hurt and angry _too_.

Groaning, Matteo got up again and pulled on a pair of jeans and grabbed a hoodie from the floor, throwing it on. The smell hit him, and he let out a small growl, it was _David’s_. It smelled like _his_ deodorant, _his_ soap, _his_ cologne all mixed together with just a hint of weed courtesy of Matteo.

He sighed and grabbed his keys and wallet from his bed table and pocketed his phone. Closing his eyes, he went to the closet and grabbed another hoodie because he didn’t see David grab anything but his discarded jeans and shirt before he stormed out and it was getting cold out.

The bedroom door creaked as he walked out into the hallway and into the living room. It crossed his mind to give Laura a head’s up, but doing so would tip David off and he didn’t want David to run off again. Or worse yet, refusing to speak to or see him. He was going to go with the surprise tactic and hope that it didn’t make things worse.

He made the short walk to the front door, pulling the hood over his head.

“Hey,” A quiet voice behind him startled Matteo. He turned and was surprised to see David sitting cross-legged on the sofa. The discarded clothes David had picked up when he stormed off now lay in a pile on the sofa arm rest.

Matteo cleared his throat, “Hey.” He held out the hoodie to David, “I was going to bring you this.”

“Thanks,” David took it and pulled it on, leaving the front unzipped. After a few awkward moments, David was the first to speak, “I didn’t go to Laura’s, obviously.”

“Obviously,” Matteo repeated softly, his voice neutral.

“I’ve just been sitting here,” David told him, picking at the sleeve of his hoodie. Matteo could tell that the other boy had been crying too. “I didn’t want to run away again. I don’t want to run away from you.”

Matteo crossed the distance and sat down tentatively on the sofa next to his boyfriend. He felt like he was asking permission.

David took a breath, “Telling you that I was trans was probably the hardest thing I’ve ever done. I think at that point, a part of me had already fallen in love with you. I just…I didn’t want it to ruin any chance for _us_.”

“I know,” Matteo responded in a whisper. “I already knew I loved you.”

“You did?” David finally looked up to see Matteo nod.

“At least, I thought that’s what it was,” Matteo admitted.

David averted his eyes to the floor, “What did you think? When I told you?”

“I -" Matteo stopped himself, thinking back to that moment. It had all felt like a rush of water being dumped over him, confusion, a lot of questions, and anger at David for not trusting him sooner. But most of all he felt this overwhelming sense of something else. Something he couldn’t place. A feeling that he just wanted to be with David and sit there with him and _please don’t leave_. “Well, I knew I wanted to be with you. I just didn’t know what that meant for my coming out.”

“What do you mean?”

Matteo scratched the back of his head, “I was confused. I’m not into girls and when you said…I didn’t know what that made me,” he paused and reached over to raise David’s chin, so they were looking eye to eye, “I know you’re a boy. You’ve always been a boy. Okay? I do. I just…I didn’t know what to think at the time. I didn't even really know what that meant. I’d never…you’re the first transgender person I’ve ever met.”

“You probably have, you just didn’t know it,” David replied softly.

“Or that,” Matteo shrugged and paused. “Why do you think I’m transphobic?”

David closed his eyes, “I don’t. Not really.” He looked at Matteo, “I just…I guess I was surprised at how checked out you were around my friends. Even when we’re hanging with the boys, you don’t act like that.”

“I don’t like them,” Matteo admitted so quietly that David had to strain to hear him, “And it’s not because they’re transgender. It’s because,” Matteo looked down at his lap, fidgeting with his fingers. “They...they are smart and at university and funny and...and they understand you - what you’ve been through, what you’re going through.”

David’s whole demeanor softened a bit, “Matteo.”

“And if you must know, that guy, Art, he is smart, and he made you smile and he’s good looking and he has a future and he’s been around the world. I’m sure he didn’t have to retake his Spanish abi,” Matteo couldn’t look at David, “He’s got his shit together. And he’s probably better...better in bed than me,” Matteo hadn’t meant to say that last part out loud, but now that it was out, he decided to keep going. “I’m sure he’s not a clingy, fumbling mess who has abs and eats normal sandwiches and can satisfy you and isn’t afraid of the future and — mmf.” Matteo was shocked to feel David’s lips pressing hard against his, David’s tongue slipping between Matteo’s parted lips and teeth.

Once Matteo’s surprise wore off, he felt David deepen the kiss. Matteo let out a faint moan wondering when David’s hand had moved to cradle the back of his head and how he suddenly was on top of Matteo.

“Matteo Florenzi, what am I going to do with you?” David giggled breathlessly, breaking the kiss. “I. Am. Yours.” David emphasized each word with a feather kiss. “Okay? I love you.”

Matteo chased David’s lips with his own. He felt the other boy grind down just a touch, sending a small tremor of pleasure through Matteo’s body.

“We’re going to talk about everything you just mentioned,” David said sternly, “But right now,” David’s voice suddenly became a little lower, a little deeper and Matteo felt it go straight to his groin, “Right now we’re going to have sex and I am going to scream your name. You’re going to turn me into a trembling mess so that I only know you. Then you’re going to make me come so hard I can only whimper. Okay?”

Matteo’s eyes grew wide with every passing word David spoke, and he couldn’t help but groan softly.

“Breathe,” David reminded as Matteo realized he had been holding his breath. He exhaled, his breath coming out stuttered. “Say yes, babe,” David chuckled.

“Yes!” It came out as a squeak and Matteo closed his eyes, trying to ward off embarrassment at the sound.

David laughed again, rolling on his back and pulling Matteo on top of him.

“This is good,” Matteo smiled, diving in for a kiss.

“This is good,” David repeated before both boys lost themselves.

It became later before either boy had realized, the gray shadows that once danced around their living room were now replaced by dim sunlight starting to streak across the floor.

Matteo laid boneless while David laid on top of him and smoothed his hair back, kissing any part of skin within reach. He reached up and grasped David’s hand, slotting their fingers together.

“You said a lot of things earlier,” David started gently, pulling the throw blanket from the top of the sofa over the both of them with his free hand.

“I did?” Matteo closed his eyes, enjoying the feel of David’s hands roaming around his sides, the soft material of the shirt David was wearing felt good against his skin.

“Mmhmm,” David nodded, “You want to tell me again why you think Art is a threat to you?”

Matteo shrugged; he didn’t want to say it again. Hadn’t meant to say in the first place. That’s why he preferred to stay quiet and think. When he thought, shit like this didn’t happen. He could be in control.

“Matteo?”

Sighing, Matteo let go of David’s hand in favor of wrapping both his arms around the body on top of him. “Does it really matter anymore?”

“It does to me,” David stated, and Matteo knew the little bit of will power he had left was going to crumble.

“I…you could do so much better than me,” Matteo admitted. He couldn’t look David in the eyes. He felt David flinch.

“I feel sorry for you.” It wasn’t the response Matteo had expected and he looked down to see if David was joking or not. “I feel sorry that you think so little of yourself when you have given me so much.”

Matteo frowned, “What?”

“You are the first person who heard me. Who understood. Who fought for me to be more than a fucking vampire, even when I wasn’t fighting for myself. You didn’t let me run away. You stood next to me,” David sniffled, “How could you ever think that you’re not good enough for me?”

“I…” Matteo suddenly found his throat thick with unshed tears, “I know I can say the wrong things and sometimes I just don’t know how to handle things.”

David smiled softly, reaching to brush some of Matteo’s hair out of his eyes and Matteo had to look up, trying to stop the tears.

“You told me that I had all the time in the world. I’m telling you the same thing. I’m here, I’m not going anywhere. And we have our whole lives to figure out the rest, okay?” David promised.

“Does this mean you believe in fate now?” Matteo tried to joke watching David half smile.

“It means that I think we make the choice to be together,” David admitted, “And I know that I choose you. So, if you want to call that fate or destiny or whatever, then so be it.”

Matteo ran his hand up and down David’s back, “I’m never going to be the smartest guy. I don’t even know what I want to do with my life.”

“Are you kidding? The first time I went to the WG, I was freaking out that you knew how to install an emulator onto your computer. I almost got down on my knees and worshiped you,” David giggled.

“That would’ve been a waste,” Matteo joked and yelped as David playfully pinched in his side.

“I’m trying to be sincere,” David smiled, and Matteo found himself smiling along.

Matteo shifted slightly, “Art was flirting with you.”

“So?” David asked, “Let him flirt. Let any guy or girl flirt. Doesn’t change anything.”

“It does for me,” Matteo said honestly. “I’m your boyfriend.”

“Okay,” David nodded.

“Okay?” Matteo was confused.

“Yeah. Easy. I’ll tell him to stop,” David smiled. “If you’re uncomfortable, I’m uncomfortable.”

Matteo pulled David up for a kiss, “Won’t that make things awkward between you two? He’s your friend.”

“And like you said, _you_ are my boyfriend,” David rested his head against Matteo’s shoulder and Matteo’s hand automatically found its way into the other boy's hair. It had become a thing for him to play with David’s hair, run his fingers through the strands, smooth out the curls only to watch them bounce back into place. “Just talk to me babe. Don’t let this shit eat you up.”

“Hmm,” Matteo hummed.

“I’ll make you a deal,” David lifted his head and kissed Matteo’s cheek before he brought their foreheads together. “I’ll try to stop running away if you try to start telling me your feelings. Deal?”

Matteo looked up into his boyfriend’s eyes and felt safer than he had in a long time. “Deal.”

**Author's Note:**

> Fun little fact about this story, I listened to "From Now On" from the Greatest Showman on repeat while writing the entire thing. Which, it's really not a mad/angry song.
> 
> Also, another fun fact -- this was super hard for me to write. I actually got really emotional writing the dialogue in the description and had to stop for a while. 
> 
> My Road Trip story should be updated either tomorrow or Saturday. 
> 
> Also, if you're interested, I compiled all the Instagram and WhatsApp posts/chats/stories into another updated video: https://youtu.be/LRWAq0W7XLE


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